Monday, November 19, 2012

Taming the Dragon (A Post About Submission)

T-13.

13 days?!! Oh boy! Where did the days go?! Our wedding day is just so around the corner...YIKES!!! I CANNOT BILIB IT!!! (okay, all exclamation points should stop right here. hihih) :)

Since our big day is fast approaching, we decided to finish our stationaries by last week. And by God's grace we were able to finish most of them. Gaaah! It was such a relief.

You see, me and Dan are sooooo involved in this wedding - even which pasta goes into which bowl in our table centerpiece, we both make the call.  Sometimes we finish tasks easy breezily. But sometimes it takes us millions of years! Conflicts arise when both of us have opposing views (like when we have different opinion on what are necessary or just plain kaartehan). And being the bridezilla bratty me, I want to get things my way. I know it is wrong but I CANNOT HELP IT!

The Bible calls wives to be submit to your husbands, as to the Lord (Ephesians 5:22).

I know!! IT IS NOT EASY! Pride and some feminist views get in the way at times. Or there are days when I'll say, "my way is better" or "ikaw kasi kahit anu-ano lang, okay na".  I cannot just let go of things sometimes.

One of the reasons (I think) why I won't submit to Dan is I do not TRUST him enough....that we he would make the best decision and that he cares about what I want. Ako naman kasi, nauunahan kaagad ng tampo and emotion kaya drama queen kaagad ang peg. But now I realize, he hasn't done anything that he didn't think through (and through and through to the nth level). Si Dan pa! One of the things I like about him is that he is very responsible. And the lola in me, always forget that! Oh, screwed up me...

As our wedding day approaches, may God continually change my heart from being an aggressive and dominating one to a trustful and submissive one. I definitely cannot do it alone, but I know God (Who sustains me each day) can.

Tonight's Prayer: Heavenly Father, Thank You for bringing Dan into my life 6 years ago. Thank You for sustaining him, showering him with Your love and patience to withstand all my quirkiness and sometimes evil me. Thank You for not making him come to his senses, even asking my hand for marriage...Lord God, after two weeks, I will be one with Dan. I pray that may You mold to be a suitable partner for him, trusting and supporting him always. I know I am still far far away from being a perfect / ideal wife. But I do not trust myself, I trust You (a quote from Ptr Jeff's wife). I know You will never forsake and leave me. Amen.

Friday, November 2, 2012

Wedding DIY: Pouchette / Petal Envelope

T-30. 


1 month to go, and I will be a Mrs. Danilo Chua!! Imagine?!? ONE MONTH!! I am excited, nervous and panicky all the same time. It's like there's a whirlpool of emotions going on inside me. :)


Lately, I find blogging as some sort of relaxation and relief. Or maybe, I just need an outlet...hahahah! Since I don't have anyone to share my excitement and rants with (other than Dan), I just write everything here (journals are made for that, right?). I also decided not to create a separate blog/wedsite for our wedding. I just find it a waste of cyberspace coz there's no more use for it after the wedding (just my opinion)...or maybe I am just plain lazy? hahah!  


Anyway, today I'll share our DIY petal envelopes for our pre-wedding celebrations. Yes, PRE-WEDDING! and not just for one, but for two pre-wedding celebrations... :) By God's grace, Dan's both side of the family were blessed with big families. And since our wedding venue can only accommodate 250 guests, we cannot invite them all on our big day. Thank you for my future in-law's kindness for arranging everything and also for their generosity for footing the bill. Yey! :D

Sorry, I digress. :)

You can find a lot of DIY instructions for petal envelope on the web, but some requires a lot of tools (like protractors, bone folders, cutter machines, etc.). For my pouchette, these are just the materials that I used:
-  A2 vellum paper (got it for SGD1.2 at Fancy Paper, Bugis)
-  ruler
-  pencil
-  eraser
-  typewriting paper
-  scissor
-  brush (optional) 


Step 1: Go to Printable Paper site and print the polar graph with 15 degrees angle and 1/4 inch radial. Cut to desired size (my invite is 6 inches, so I cut a 6 1/4" diameter circle. Fold the circle into half.


Step 2: Get the vellum paper. Fold it lengthwise.


Step 3: Fold again the paper into 3 even pieces, then cut. By now, you should have 6 12"x12" square vellum pieces.


Step 4: Get a piece of the vellum paper and the ruler. Draw a box with the same size as your base circle. Get and trace your "improvised" protractor to create the flaps. Cut to have something like this (this will be your trace paper):


Step 5: Before folding, you may want to erase the traces. You may use a brush to wipe off the dirt.


Step 6: Fold each flap in to form the pouchette. Create folds with your finger or a ruler to help the flaps lay flat.


Step 7: Insert your invite...then, taaaddaaahh!

At first, I was contemplating if I will just buy online and have them delivered from US. Thank God I did not coz I saved more than 40SGD from shipment and stuff! I also thank God for my very loving and supportive fiancé who stayed up with me til wee hours to cut and fold the papers. :)

More DIYs to come :)


Thursday, October 25, 2012

All About Changes

T-38.

I may exude calmness and 'everythin' is all right' demeanor about our wedding preps but deep inside I am screaming, "Our wedding's gonna be SOOOOO SOON, and I am not yet ready!!!".

It's not just about wedding preparation - the table seating, which we haven't finalised, Dan's DREADED first dance which I haven't figured out yet, and others stuff....

It's just that, I am still not ready to face the CHANGES that's gonna happen in my life. I am not good with changes. I worry about the changes that those changes would bring into my day-to-day life. I hate all the inconveniences and all the adjustments, like when Dan was accepted at Visa, I cried like a baby (because I won't see him as much anymore). When I first heard Eldee (Dan's sister) would study here, I worried that she would bother us all time. Even the minute things - the bathroom when we moved house, the finger scanner in the office (before, we used card access).

For our upcoming marriage/wedding, here are the changes that I am a little squeamish about:
1. Change of my name title from Ms. to Mrs 
    - It's just that I feel so old (yes! I am still in denial. hahahah! )

2. Change of my surname from Sia to Chua 
    - Don't get me wrong, I like Chua. There's nothing wrong with. It's just that it is so hard to let go of my precious father's name that has been with me for 28 years of my life.

 3. Change where I should now submit to someone
    - To submit to my parents, to the government, to my bosses is natural (but still, sometimes I fail... :( ) But to submit to Dan is such a struggle. Is it because I am the eldest in my family, and he's the middle child? Or because I am months older? I don't know...

  4. Change that I should not always think about myself, but Dan and my future kids (if God will provide).
     - Because sometimes, I tend to be selfish

 T-38, and I am still thinking about all these things!! I don't know what to do but I am convinced that God would get me through me this.
 
Tonight's Prayer:  Heavenly Father, thank You for bringing us this far in our wedding preparation. As we prepare for our big day, help us prepare our hearts and minds for marriage. As a new season of life unfolds before our eyes, we are confident that You will be with us in each step, as You've been with us all this time. Help us not to worry, not to rely on ourselves but on You. Because we know that You are faithful and You don't change. You are the Author of our lives and all its seasons of changes has been written lovingly by Your Hands. Help us to cling on you always. In Jesus Christ's precious name, I pray. Amen.